For reals, I feel so crazy. And I mean literally crazy. I wake up each morning and look in the mirror and am like, WHAT THE HECK? And really, I just want to go back to bed because . .. who knows what sort of surprises the days holds. And I'm not feeling ready for any more surprises. Thank you Universe, but I think I'm good for now. Move along to someone else . . . IE . . . Shew!
Only, the Universe doesn't even bother listening. In face, I'm 100% sure I hear a slightly mischievous laugh . . . Ha ha ha, she thinks she's done! It's only the beginning . . . after my morning ritual of looking at myself in the mirror.
Truth.
So in response to the trickster Universe, I woke up at 4:56am and got out of bed BEFORE any mischief could happen. I turned on the fire place and pulled out my old notebook and pen and let my thoughts flow out slowly and unevenly through my hands, old school writing. Finally, after literally months of beautiful madness (my summer schedule still gives me hives of joy), I am literally carving out time to just catch my breath. In fact, I needed to figure out how to breath again. When you spend months breathing for others, you forget what it feels like to breath your own air.
So this morning, in the dark gray pre morning light, I took my first original breath in months.
Hallelujah.
It felt . . . like breathing.
It felt like . . . the first day of cool fall.
Wait, that really was how it felt outside. Magical. Like falling in love.
Only, I just got to stop long enough to notice it's really not summer anymore.
Hallelujah.
This summer taught me so much. . . like I feel like I got a second Master's degree in Dealing With Lots and Lots of Change and Parties and Guests and Traveling and Being Happy Through It All (at least some of the time). Honestly, maybe even I got a Doctorate.
I think I could teach a seminar.
And this is what I would say, "All you overloaded, overworked, overstressed, overprinted, underpaid, afraid, worried, unhappy, and alone people out there . . . pull out your notebooks and write this down. . . I AM AWESOME. I AM STRONG. I AM SO STINKING SMART. AND I CAN DO ANYTHING. . . JUST LOOK AT MY LIFE . . . THERE IS AMAZING EVERYWHERE AND THAT'S BECAUSE I EXIST AND I GIVE AND LOVE AND ENGAGE IN THIS MAD THING CALLED LIFE.
Now, close your notebook and lean back, because we are going to do some serious self care and watch The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (my allllll time favorite movie ever) or Frozen or Pride and Prejudice (Kiera Nightly version) or Yesterday or Peanut Butter Falcon or pretty any other movie that makes us laugh and cry and remember that we have amazing inside us. THE END."
And we'd watch movies the rest of the week long seminary . . . everyone getting a chance to pick. And we'd eat caramel popcorn and sliced apples (my favorite treat . . . hey, I'm running the seminar, I get to choose right?) and bring in pillows and blanket and if we want, we can also just take naps.
What do you think? Because, for reals, I would totally go to this seminar. In a millisecond. An excuse to step away from the madness of our lives and actually do a little guilt free lounging. It's a win win.
Education Week next year, here I come!
Harvard Business School, I've to a total plan for you . . . for reals, after my week Seminar on Being Awesome, you'd notice amazing increase in productivity and most of all . . . jolliness. And who doesn't need more jolliness in the business place, right?
On second thought, I'm not waiting until next year. I'm starting this next week. And I'm inviting you all. Tuesday, Sept 24th is my first day of Seminar Awesome . . . it starts at 1pm and involves each of us wherever we may be, too sit our fannies down and watch our secret guilty even if someone makes fun of us we still love it movie or tv show for at least 45 minutes without a second of guilt. It's my first assignment.
And all you overachievers, for reals, you can't NOT doing it right?
If you happen to live close to me, I've got the couch that God, when He comes again, will surely declare divine and gilt in gold, no joke, because it is BEYOND comfortable. It hugs you and says, Oh, thank you, I'm so glad you're here. You're the best ever. Stay awhile, And you are like, Ok. In fact, I may NEVER leave. Yep, it's that great. And I'll be on it and there is room for like 25 people on it. No joke. I'll be snuggling up on it with the most darling little baby boy you can imagine. He'll probably hug you. He hugs everyone. And I'm going to watch The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. I'll have caramel popcorn and apples and maybe some licorice because, for reals, it's not candy, it's bread in red form. So come over . . . Ace the first assignment with me.
And for just a few minutes, lets cheat Trixy Old Universe and steal back some serious silliness and jolliness and remember how it feels to breathe our own breath (did I spell those right?).
We are AWESOME!
WE ARE AMAZING!
Yes! YES! We can literally do ANYTHING.
It's true. I climbed a big scary mountain with Goats and Wild Wind and horrifying drop offs with an ankle that I couldn't walk on a few weeks ago. I climbed it one step at a time. I told myself, each step, You are strong. You are strong. Just one more step. 15 miles. 4580 ft elevation change. Up 4580. Down 4580.
Yep. I summited an 11000 foot mountain with a tendon pull and a ligament strain (maybe not the smartest idea . . . but don't they say smart ideas don't create awesome?)
I had the bestest of friends with me who talked me through it . . . literally . . . and the sweetest angel middle aged man who guided us on the right path when we were literals off on the goat trail. And when we were like, Oh crap oh crap oh crap the wind is REALLY strong and that edge is really steep and we could get blow off any second, he'd say things like, Listen ladies, I hate this so so much. I HATE heights, yet here I am. Again. For the seventh time. And this is what I say, Oh my heck, my FREAKING mother does this. I CAN do this. And we'd laugh and keep walking and soon the treacherous parts were past and we were on saver ground. Before we knew it, we were in the shack signing our names in the "Summited Book" being flapped in the face by prayer flags, laughing our heads off because WE MADE IT.
And trust me, people. we are all going to make it. Maybe limping along. Maybe shaking with fear. Maybe off for a second on a goat trail, but there will always be someone looking out for us, pulling us back. Because we know for a fact that our Freaking Awesome Mamas and Dads have all done this. Our grandparents have done this and their parents before them and so on and so forth back to Adam and Eve. They all had crazy and sometimes REAL CRAZY (Black Plague . . . man, that was a jolly killer for sure, eh?), but humanity puzzled it out and went on and laughed and cried and KICKED BUTT!
So. Will. We.
Especially we all watch movies/tv shows we want next Tuesday, September 24th at 1pm.
It's the beginning of something awesome. Oh, yeah . . . the rest of our life.
No more WHAT THE HECK?! Each morning. Nope. It's more like, Yeah, so today . . . what movie am I watching after I just submit this awesome book or play or business proposal or art project or bake the worlds best bread ever baked (and when you do, send me a slice. Bread . . . it's my secret strength).
Yep. Whose with me?
Seminar AWESOME is starting in T-MINUS 3 days and lots of hours and seconds and minutes . . .
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