Skip to main content

Day 100 . . . I mean 10 of quarantine


I am going to weigh 900 pounds by the end of this.


The first five days, I was in shock and fear and worry and I didn't eat. 

These last five days . . . lets just say it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say all I've done is eat.   Forget healthy stuff,  I want CARBS.  Not pictured is the bundt cake (ate it too fast) and double recipe of chocolate chip cookies (gone gone gone).  And chips, oh how I love my salty flavorful chips . . .

Because, lets face it, we all need something good in our lives right now.  Mine might be cookies and Doritos. Yours might be carrots and celery (you go!).  What ever it is, doesn't it feels wonderful to gather around warm/delicious things and share them and enjoy something together.  We are REALLY enjoying our time together these day?

Well . . . sort of.  We are all at loose ends.  John's used being gone all day, and during that day super busy.  I'm used to being home alone for about six hours where I'm running around keeping everything running (sort of).  The kids are used to being gone six hours and then off to their many lessons and activities during the afternoon and evenings.  That's all gone.  Now that 90% of John's job is on hold until things open back up, he's come home and decided to get us all organized and cleaned.

You can imagine how well that has gone over.

I had this moment yesterday when John was trying to get the laundry room into spit spot shape (a very very bad idea because it's a LAUNDRY room . . . everything is dirty and disorganized), railing about how much junk is in there (ahem, he may or may not have been the person who put it there) and how we were all crazy to live in this disorder, where I sort of wanted to sit down and cry.  We were on day 9 and already going a little crazy. 

I thought, Oh no, this is going to be HORRIBLE and ETERNAL if this goes on like this.

Only I didn't actually just think it, I SAID it.  Out loud.  In front of him.

Poor John looked up at me (and he may have been a little bit frantic at that moment), and lost it just a little bit.

Bless his heart, I wasn't very patient.  Usually, I am.  I've got my crap together but at that moment as things were flying out of the laundry room (including things that actually go there), I lost it too.

Might not have been our best moment.  

But the result was.  

It let us both start the conversation (which is still going on) about expectations during this madness.  I can't keep the house as tidy as usual because it turns out we are ALL living here 24/7.  The laundry room has NEVER seen such use.  There are art projects and food being eaten in every room.  There are people dropping random clothes in every corner of this house.  We will ALL go insane if we don't just calm down and live with a little clutter.  

Each night we can tidy up, but until then, I'm letting Piper's six pairs of socks (she has a problem putting on and then in five minute taking off a pair of socks) float around.  I don't care that the kitchen is messy . . . lunch is in 10 minutes anyways.  And then snack and second snack and pre dinner snack and dinner and after dinner snack.  It's unending.  Also amazing because we are eating lovely food and enjoying each other. So let the kitchen be a bit of a disaster.  It's all part of this.

Everything is a little bit of a disaster.

Home school?

Uhhhhhh . . . not going so well.

Because I simply DON'T CARE.  I can't.  There's literally too much uncomfortable and strange and disorienting for our kids.  Throw strange projects and work at them and they loose their crap.  At least mine do.  We do the best we can, and when I hear that frustration in their voices, and they storm off, I let them.  This is hard.  Everyone is doing their best (and the teacher are ROCKING THIS!) and I want these kids to know that there is no failure.  This is no bad grades right now.  There is just trying and keep on trying each day. 

They are the brave ones to me.  So much new and uncomfortable  and they have to deal with stressed parents and worry about their grandparents.  They are shouldering it all so well.  And no friends or very little friend interactions . . . bless their hearts!  I just love them all and understand when they slump around the house being glum.  Which never lasts by the way.  They bounce back and are running around teasing and laughing with each other without an hour.  We could all learn something from them, huh?

So right now, everyone is feeling low.  The sky is gray for the second day in a row.  It's cold and windy and miserable out.  It seems like the only news is bad and there's no end.  So we're stepping away from school and expectations and snuggling in and watching movies all afternoon . . . maybe even night.

Order out?

Yes.

Supporting local businesses . . .  of course!  

Doing our part!

Day 10 . . . 
How I end each day . .. looking at Hero . . . sleeping!

And also this one . . . cuteness knows no end!















Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Forced Frugality

  We are going on ten months of looking for a job.   Last September, after a rather horrid ten months, John got the boot.  It was oddly and rather unfairly done, but a great relief to all of us.  Working at that company had become a puzzle that grew harder and harder each day until it was in fact, impossible.  The stress of it took a wild toll on John's mental and physical health.  By the end, he was neither eating nor sleeping.  He had strange episodes of racing heart and an inability to tell what was real and what was imagined.  I sat him down and told him I would use up every penny of our retirement and sell the house if it meant he could stop working in that environment.  And it may take all that.  And I still won't regret it.   When I feel rather sorry for myself, I remember what life was like for him a year ago and then I don't feel sad that I am once again digging through my closet to find a new way to wear old things.   In fact, there is part of me (small though it
Post a Comment
Read more

The Best Kind of Tired

  My often daily life . . . (John is two feet away—I can’t do all of them by myself) Last week, every single time I sat down, I almost instantly fell asleep.  I kept telling John, I have the sleeping disease.  What is going on?  Am I getting old?  Is it the covid after effects?  What on earth? He didn’t have any answers for me because he was doing the same thing.   We didn’t really do anything for seven days straights.   And our kids joined us in the sleepy, do nothing, lazy slug bug state. It wasn’t until this morning as I was looking over the pictures of the summer that I realized why. . . We literally haven’t stopped ALL summer long—one awesome amazing trip/visit/fun after the other.  It’s like we are making up for last years “staycations.”  Holy hannah have we ever made up for it.  Just about did ourselves in playing and hugging and kissing and caring for babies. Highlights of the summer (in no particular order): Cousin sleepovers have resumed (most missed activity since the pandem
Post a Comment
Read more

Midlife-Cri-sis

It's been a year.   I'll sum it up by saying that food no longer tastes good to me.   The last time that happened, I had lost three pregnancies in a row and John had lost and found a job and we had moved three times. The feeling is very similar.   There have a been a lot of losses or near losses.  Enough that when the phone pings with a text or vibrates with a call (I long ago turned off the ringer), I take a deep breath and think, you can do this .  More times than not, I need that deep breath. I am probably in the second half of my life and I feel it.  47.  My children are nearly grown.  My house is established.  Our bank accounts don't fluctuate like they used to. I don't go to the store and dream of being able to buy things.  I walk into my closet and wonder what I can do without.   I feel the finality of my existence and I wonder . . . what do I really want out of all this?   For book club, we read A Million Miles in a Thousand Years .  It's about re-writing o
Post a Comment
Read more