The Phoenix: Epicuriousmothering Rising

The view from our hike to Box Elder (it was wicked hard, but GORGEOUS . . . and we got to see it a lot because we kept having to stop and catch our breath) First off, who did a little movie/show watching on Tuesday at 1pm? Oh, yeah, I did.  With little Henry on my lap, and it was some baby show I cannot pronounce . . . but he loved it and I got to relax for a minute so I count that as a win win.  And it was fruit snacks and goldfish instead of apples and popcorn, but again . . . we were all happy, so that's a win. Today was such a good day. No for reals, there is no filter, it was this breathtaking (literally) I woke up before my alarm (darn bladder), but didn't get too frustrated. We ran in the dark and despite the endless stream of cars blinding us with their lights, I was able to run without pain or wonky stride so being blinded was NOTHING. My German pancakes, which have been big flops lately, came out PERFECTLY--fluffy, light, crisp on the edges and ...

For reals, I feel so crazy.  And I mean literally crazy.  I wake up each morning and look in the mirror and am like, WHAT THE HECK?  And really, I just want to go back to bed because . .. who knows what sort of surprises the days holds.  And I'm not feeling ready for any more surprises.  Thank you Universe, but I think I'm good for now.  Move along to someone else . . . IE . . . Shew! Only, the Universe doesn't even bother listening.  In face, I'm 100% sure I hear a slightly mischievous  laugh . . . Ha ha ha, she thinks she's done!  It's only the beginning . . . after my morning ritual of looking at myself in the mirror.  Truth. So in response to the trickster Universe, I woke up at 4:56am and got out of bed BEFORE any mischief could happen.  I turned on the fire place and pulled out my old notebook and pen and let my thoughts flow out slowly and unevenly through my hands, old school writing.  Finally, after lite...

Saturday I turn 44. I look 44. A few years ago, I tried really hard to hide the fact that I was in my 40s. I was, in fact, idiotic.  It happens. Now, each day, I look in the mirror and think, Hey, only one new wrinkle. Dang girl, you're looking good! Yeah.  At some point, I had this shift.  Instead of all the stuff going wrong, I started being really grateful for all the stuff that's going right. Which tops my list: 1.  Glad to be alive, just because I am ALIVE .  It's a blessing to be able to be in this miraculous world right at this moment. 2. Watching my children grow up .  Rearing children is the stuff of jugglers, optimists, heroes, mathematicians, estheticians, nutritionalists and magicians. Watching them leap out of the nest and fly, more awesome (and terrifying) than I ever expected.  Moses, it's amazing.  Thank you, God, for letting me be here to watch this . . . please help me not to mess it up. 3...